I love FBLA seniors and I will be incredibly sad when you guys leave for college :( What will we do without 07?

It's not just seniors in FBLA I will miss, but Speech+Debate seniors, Community Leadership seniors, and random seniors that I just know from school. Like a certain 3 CSF seniors, and one particular Community Leadership senior. But we still have 5/6 of the year left, so what am I griping about?

Anyways color guard was a great embarrassing three hours yesterday (it was only like the second half). I guess I can kind of compare it to entre at states last year, but to a lesser degree. But what's so contrasting between these two experiences is that I dug in and tried harder in FBLA after I screwed up, but now I'm kind of indifferent about all this. I wouldn't say that I don't care about color guard anymore, it's just that it's because one of those tasks that I always have to power through each Tuesday night and Saturday. I don't look forward to those practices at all. I feel like my interest is dying and each practice just cements this growing dread that is starting to slowly develop, and one reason why I'm definitely not doing winter guard is because by the end of sophomore year, if this keeps up, I will HATE color guard.

I'll list out my reasons for not doing it:
1. too much stuff--how am I supposed to be an FBLA and CSF officer, while doing recycling for Environmental every week, and prep for piano advanced testing on top of maintaining my GPA?
2. time off--like I said, I don't think I will be a very happy Alice if I go through WINTER guard. Which is, by the way, spending every Saturday going to random schools while other schools laugh at us because we suck and then having a color guard hangover each Sunday and starting homework and officer duties on Sunday afternoon? NO THANKS.
3. people--the people in color guard used to annoy me a lot... like I used to think, "why the hell do they care about this?! we're not even that great!!" but I realize that it's because people have different values and opinions and something that I dislike might be an activity that someone else enjoys, and that was very ignorant of me to think that way. so I guess people really shouldn't be on this list at all then.
4. effort--I'm one of those people who gives 100% when I care. you know the song remember the name? kind of like that. and I won't give 100% to winter guard, which will let down the entire guard as a whole which will NOT be good for my conscious.

but I still have a lingering part of me that wishfully thinks that I could still do it because:
1. rifle--I really really like rifle. and I'm competitive. so if I don't do winter and come back in the fall, I'll suck the most in rifle! and I LOVE rifle! I would even buy a rifle if I didn't do winter just so I could practice myself.
2. apps--looks better

oh yeah! I FINISHED FRIENDS!!!